A while ago, I was so annoyed with teenage girls wanting to be like Bella Swan that I couldn’t help it. I made a note. I don’t know where the original is, but here’s the improved version.
Now, if you like Twilight, fine. I can see the appeal. I myself, was glued to the first book like someone had just sprayed the pages with some sort of drug and I had to keep reading. New Moon was generally awful and Eclipse was more mellow like crack. I don’t think Twilight is a good book, but credit where credit’s due: it is addicting. Certain characters do have some appeal (I quite liked Alice, she was like a breath of fresh air in the midst of all the moping). But.
But.
I hate Bella. I do think she’s a shallow bitch who should have died when she jumped off that cliff in New Moon. You should never ever ever base your life on a guy and that’s exactly what she did.
Now, I should go and write/illustrate a similar thing regarding Anastasia Steele, i.e. An Even More Annoying Bella.

Gearing Up to Get An Agent
“I hate Bella.”
Welcome to the club. Your badge will be arriving by mail in three days time.
It is impossible not to hate her, right? I’d say she’s the worst heroine ever, but E.L. James’s version of her (Anastasia Steele) managed to steal the trophy somehow.
I’m not sure we can even call Anastasia Steele a heroine…